Dear Italian femmin,
But che dick want you from my Johnny? Who does incul you? Quando have we chiest your opinion? Mica we have chiest: “Sorry, all Italian femmins, but what do you pens of Johnny?”
I think you stai a rosica’ because Johnny not te se fila even di striscio pure now that he is a bit chiatto. But man of panz, man of substance, zia!
And remember infatt che Johnny has the substance and if he wants he accatta himself an esercito of personal trainers and in meno that 3 weeks he is back as a fico and with big muscols che nemmeno Leonida in the 300 film. Big Jim je make a pippa.
But poi we don’t frega cazz di outside bellezza, Johnny is beautiful dentro. And also he is so rich that quando striscia the American Express the cassa starts making fuochi d’artificio che nemmeno a Naples at Piedigrotta. And pure io don’t scherz. And you say my Johnny is dressed like monnezza? My Johnny? But when ti sei made Kate Moss and Winona Ryder and quella di Dirty Dancing what te ne fott of eleganza?
And poi m’have you vista? Johnny can be brutt but he stays with me and I am so bell that when your boyfriend sees me on the rivista, he walks veloce to the bathroom and comes out with big occhiaie.Perciò give me retta, zia, lasc my Johnny in peace and torna a wait for the SMS of that cassonetto of your collega che maybe ti invita out with his new Panda Special. I have no temp for you and your friends pussy di legno, because me and Johnny go to camporella with his yacht.
Ciao and saluta your sister.
And please, Italian femmin and masculi, invece di stay a make nu cazz on the computer or look at quant chiatt is Johnny, go and vote Libernazione at this minchia di Macchianera Italian Awards 2015